This was inspired by a friend. It's a take on the serious coping with stress rules. Enjoy!

1. Be unrealistic.
Rush through as much as possible ignoring all useful information and advice. Swing wildly from pessimistic idiot to optimistic fool at least twice a day. Better to live the dream that function anywhere near reality, or stability.

2. Lie to Yourself.
If I'm crotchety, I'll probably not notice until I've annoyed you and then broken down in tears. That way you realise I'm a nervous wreak and near a complete breakdown. And if I can't manage something, I'll work myself into the ground trying and then sob into a pint or two later on. Isn't that what's called an 'artistic temperament'.

3. Do even more.
Just when you think your workload, emotional stress and lack of sleep can't get any worse. Start a few extra things. Go on a diet, start a hard exercise regime, stop smoking and reorganise/redecorate your entire house. After all you need to get things done to feel good, otherwise you're good for nothing, lazy and out of shape, no matter how great your mum says you are.

4. Do it yourself.
No matter how many people offer help, refuse it and go alone. Otherwise you can't say anything you've done is your own achievement. And because you're so busy all the time you can't help anyone or see anyone else's accomplishments. So maybe next time.

5. Lose track of reality.
"If I don't succeed with this I'm going to commit myself". This is the only thing in the world worth doing and if I can't do this and lose a dress size at the same time, I'm worthless. Sometimes people are really irritating when they get in the way of my personal goals.

6. Don't tell anyone.
However stressful life is, we can ignore it most of the time. But then sometimes it will hit you all at once. It's okay to bottle it all up until you pop like a balloon causing confusion in workmates, family and friends cause they hadn't a clue about what's been going on.

7. Do it all at once.
Set unrealistic goals and when you can't achieve them try to stay up all night working. You won't be able to manage if you still have loads to do tomorrow.

:shock: :o :? :) :D :lol:

Glad you enjoyed it. 8)

I'm actually not stressed out at the moment. I think I'm too lazy just now to be. It's watching these cats laze about all day. Hmm, you know, I want to be a kitten when I grow up.

Awww. I see all of those at work every day. Weee!!!! Hehehehe. Good stuff. Be careful, you might start a giant email spam chain letter with that. :O :O

Haha! Then it would be Jo's fault, she had the original version. 'How not to be stressed'. :)

I learn by contraries though, so I wrote them all backwards. To help me even further, show how stupid the other way is.